(no subject)

[okami_hu]

I'm having some slight argument with sockren about self-confidence and such... Plus, no matter how I try, Rich text mode refuses to work, but that's my own problem. Anyway, Sockren made that comment, that if I'm writing for the reviews, I should quit. I replied, that I believe in equivalent trade, so when I work hard, I want approval for that. He told me to find it in myself then. Well, thanks, I actually do. But it's not enough. I write, because I can, because I like it and because it's in my nature, to express my feelings and thoughts either through talking or writing. I want to make people happy with my stories and I want to inspire them. I want others to get ideas when they read what I write and I absolutely crave the feedback. After all, that's the proof, that others are interested in my work, and I succeeded to channel some meaning and mood and that's the goal of every literature - to touch the reader's soul. If a writing fails to do that, it's useless. And I'm feeling useless quite often so... Isn't it just natural, that I want my fellow anime-fans to cheer me up? C'mon, who else if not them?

This is a song I like very much; it could be my personal prayer or motto, even if I don't agree with every line (My mom did a very lousy job on raising us. I needed approval, she told me to quit drawing because I cannot make a living outta that; and she should have left my bro alone with that girl; they parted after one year anyway...) Sometimes, I cry when I listen to it. A good song, really. A little FMA-related too.


I believe the sun should never set upon an argument
I believe we place our happiness in other people's hands
I believe that junk food tastes so good because it's bad for you
I believe your parents did the best job they knew how to do
I believe that beauty magazines promote low self-esteem
I believe I'm loved when I'm completely by myself alone

I believe in Karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye

I believe you can't control or choose your sexuality
I believe that trust is more important than monogamy
I believe your most attractive features are your heart and soul
I believe that family is worth more than money or gold
I believe the struggle for financial freedom is unfair
I believe the only ones who disagree are millionaires

I believe in Karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye

I believe forgiveness is the key to your own happiness
I believe that wedded bliss negates the need to be undressed
I believe that God does not endorse TV evangelists
I believe in love surviving death into eternity

I believe in Karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye.

Comments

[http://users.livejournal.com/_vejitto_/]

Writing for feedback = no. Absolutely no. Write first for yourself, that you can write your thoughts out in a manner that very few people can, because this is what should be beautiful in art. No one is recognized at first blink, and approval is something that should be cherised when it's given, not measuring that it is not enough. Those who write/draw/whatever with their thoughts on the feedback they should get will never, never be as successful than those, who do these from heart, to express themselves. (I'm not good with words, I hope you understand what I mean, though)
At least, that's what I believe. I saw you get comments from people who are known in the fma fandoms as great writers, hell, sockren is watching you for your progress? That means a lot, I know it would mean to me if I was writing XD
Don't give up, girl. Just look ahead positively. Equivalent trade is not the truth of the world.

(I love this song <3 and if I mix it with FMA, then I like the 13th line best :3)

[okami-hu.livejournal.com]

Sorry, even if I visit those Emotional Intellect - classes, my Belief Window is still the same. I got over with this "I write for my desk drawer" attitude YEARS ago. What's the use of beauty, when nobody can see it? I put my heart and soul into everything I write and others should respect my bravery, when I display those stories. I have nothing aside my body and my talent. And when people don't praise one or the another, it means, that they're not worthy for it. And then, I can hang myself up on a symphatetic tree, because my life lost its meaning.

I guess, you misunderstand me. I do not write because it provides feedback, that's not the main reason. I write, because I have to. Because that's how I live; because it hurts when the ideas can't come out of my mind. Feedback is the payment. You can scrap by without it but if you want to have a pleasant life, you need it.

And Touka Koukan is a nice start indeed and I'm thankful to Sockren. Just his comment hurt a little. ^^

[ex-sockren.livejournal.com]

I apologize if you took offense to my words. I tend to be blunt and straight to the point. I have a sharp edge and a big bite. However, I meant it when I said you were a quality writer. I look forward to, with your permission, arranging to have your work posted on Touka Koukan.

[okami-hu.livejournal.com]

*melts into a happy little puddle* Shaankyuuu...! I feel so warm and loved... ^^